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While catching up on my blog reading I had a thought. Of course blog reading should conjure up all kinds of thoughts or you're wasting your time, but this was an "outside of the blog reading" thought. Or at least I think it was. It doesn't matter. It went something like this, "Are we attracted to people who are like us, or do the people who are like us feel an attraction to us?"
I've had a lot of people involved in my life over the past . . . . well, good while. One of the consistent things about the people who end up closest to me is that they tend to be pretty smart, funny, clever and witty. I'd like to think that's because they are a reflection of me, but is that the way it is? Regardless, do I gravitate to them, or do they gravitate to me? Or, do we meet somewhere in the middle by chance?
If you've ever watched Winnie-the-pooh you know the character Eeyore. Personally, I like Eeyore, but I've always wondered why he seems so, well, Eeyorish. He has all these great friends around him that are full of life and energy, and yet, it doesn't seem to bring him up or cause dancing and singing. I guess he just has an Eeyore kind of personality.
In my life, I don't have many Eeyores. Most of my friends, family, associates, cellmates (OK, I just threw that in there to see if you were still reading) and clients tend to be more Winnie-the-Pooh, Tigger and Piglet than Eeyore. Of course I get an occasional Eeyore, but I noticed that if they are like Eeyore that they are either smart, funny, clever or witty or some combination of them all. If they're smart and Eeyorish, I can deal with it because I learn something. If they're clever and Eeyorish, I can deal with it because they catch me off guard and make me think. If they are witty or funny and Eeyorish, I laugh and find them amusing. But, if they are none of these things, I find them draining. Is that because they are not like me, or because I'm not like them?
I go back to my original question, "Are we attracted to people who are like us, or do the people who are like us feel an attraction to us?" Now, the tricky part. Are the people who are attracted to you more like Winnie-the-Pooh, Tigger or Piglet, or are they more like Eeyore? I hesitate to use the word "vibes", but are the vibes that emanate from you attracting the people you want to attract? If there is a big dark cloud outside your front door I have a feeling Eeyore is rounding the bend. But, if the sun is shining and there is singing and dancing going on you might be attracting a Pooh, Tigger or Piglet. They all have something to offer your life, but if you're a Tigger kind of character too many Eeyores will wear you down.
If you're a Eeyore kind of character Tigger will get annoying eventually. Knowing which character you are will help you understand what kind of characters you will attract. If you're in business and you're an Eeyore character, you may have to put on your Tigger face during interactions to keep customers coming back. Remember, Eeyore wasn't under a cloud all the time. Sometimes he was Eeyore, but no cloud.
One final thought. There is a 3 to 1 ratio at Pooh-ville. That is probably a good ratio in your life if you're going to be healthy, happy and balanced. You can only have so many Eeyores in your life before they start bringing you down. On the flip side, if you're an Eeyore, you need to surround yourself with Poohs, Tiggers and Piglets to help bring a little extra sunshine to your life. All four personalities can work together, but knowing which character you're most like will help you determine who you need to spend more time with.